Allowing Ourselves to Risk Failure Life is one big long lesson. We find ourselves schooled by daily events, tested through our attempts. If we accept that our successes and our failures are part of life, we will not be so fearful of making mistakes. Fearing to make mistakes will keep us from taking a chance, from sensible risk taking, and in the long run, from growth. Some will even deny themselves hope or dreams, saying that if they only expect the worst they will never be disappointed. The danger of such an attitude is that it keeps us down, always looking for what can go wrong, building negative energy inside of us, keeping us fearful. Hope means being willing to take a chance, to suffer defeat because you can learn from it, knowing failure is not the end, that it is not the statement of our lives, that there are other doors we can turn to. If you have a defeatist attitude, mention it to your therapist. Such an attitude will contribute to your depression, anxiety, or phobias. Get help. Learn to hope. Believe in yourself.